Andy Milonakis - Still Waiting Rap [tekst, tłumaczenie i interpretacja piosenki]

[Verse 1]
[Andy:] I used to drink 40's but I hated the taste
Put twists in my hair cause I hated my race
[Stu:] I hated my face when I looked in the mirror
Things were fuzzy, but now they're much clearer
[Andy:] Mirror, mirror, on the wall
Who's the dopest rapper with the biggest black balls?
[Stu:] Not you or me cause we're white, remember?
We're whiter than Santa Claus' pubes in December
[Andy:] Socrates said "Be as you wish to seem"
I guess I wish to seem like a fat black teen
[Stu:] I don't got a gangsta lean, I got scoliosis
I say corny phrases like "Holy Moses"
[Andy:] Holy Moses, or Holy Jesus
Can't decide where the universe, there's so many pieces
[Stu:] But it doesn't make sense cause "Uni" means one
So we're trapped in one verse that revolves around the sun
[Andy:] It says E=MC²
That means we're two MC's but our brain is shared

[Hook: Stu]
We're whiter than Santa Claus' pubes in December

[Verse 2]
[Stu:] Just cause we're smart doesn't mean we're not gross
I'll spread you pussy lips on Shenaniganz toast
[Andy:] Yum pussy toast, pussy, pussy, pussy toast
I kill that pussy then fuck your pussy's nose
[Stu:] Your clitoris is longer than a magic bean shark
When I climb to the top a giant suck my mean cock
[Andy:] I'm the van Gogh of rhyming, I cut all my abdomen
Three fingers in but soon I have five in
[Stu:] I cum so much we be slipping and sliding
My dick's higher on the wanted list than Bin Laden
[Andy:] I fuck mad ducks cause I'm addicted to quacking
The ease style write right off my fat back
[Stu:] It's OK if you're chubby, that's why they got light balls
I'll suck your backfat then I'll spit it at a white ho
[Andy:] Gotta stop banging them psycho dyke hoes
When I was five years old I was fucking on my trike, yo
[Stu:] When I cum, it's stickier than crazy glue
Girl, you're wearing contacts, your eyes are crazy blue
[Andy:] I get bitches OCD, then they won't let me go
Cause they need to have my dick three times in a row
[Stu:] Damn, three in a row like tic-tac-toe
I'll make your face red cause I'm a dicksmack pro
[Andy:] You're good riding dick, well let's talk about BJ's
Your technique's sloppy like amateur DJ's
[Stu:] Well, my girl does it right cause she drinks all my babies
Her mouth full of foam cause she got slug rabies

[Hook: Andy]
Yum pussy toast, pussy, pussy, pussy toast

[Verse 3]
[Andy:] Just cause we're gross doesn't mean we're not smart
Got a dog named Napoleon and he chews my bone apart
[Stu:] Yo that shit doesn't matter, matter matters
Your constellations are starting to see the universe splattered
[Andy:] I fucked a black hole, and see my dick disappeared
Into a multi-dimensional creature's ear
[Stu:] On a sub-atomic level man, you're being kinda gay
[Andy:] Bitch I'd shoot my foam thumbs in your mouth all day
[Stu:] Which is a pair of blue dots, suspended in a sundae
[Both:] Fuck the bars of soap cause it's time for us to come clean

[Hook: Andy]
I fucked a black hole, and see my dick disappeared