Clayton Jokythur - The Tortoises' Song [tekst, tłumaczenie i interpretacja piosenki]

[Intro]
Yeah man, Cla-Clay here, representing all mo'fuckin' tortoises out there. Y'all gotta stay cool, don't kill humans, let us all be friends. Peace. Peace. Peace. Let's go, niggas!

[Verse 1]
Yo, if you wanna be a tortoise, well, you can't. Cuz I don't see you making noise, huh, you ain't no gent
You see, we tortoises just are, so let us be, and if you think that ain't right, I bet you'd lose a fight with me
We are all super strong and got super dicks, don't you fucking say I'm wrong, or I'mma take away your chicks
You may say "Dude, this should be a song, but it's a motherfucking rap". Well, I'll reply "Man, you're wrong, dontcha try to fuck with my rep"
I'm the best of all tortoises
And you should stop with these different noises
You better follow me on Twitter
Or I'll post your nude photo on Flickr

[Hook]
I'm a tortoise (toise)
This is our song (song)
A rap that makes noise (noise)
See ya in Hong Kong (Kong)
Where am I going?
What am I doing?
I'mma go to New York
I'm eating without a fork
I'm a tortoise (toise)
That's what I do (do)
Girlz and boyz (boyz)
See me and say "Woohoo!"

[Verse 2]
Well, I was right since the beggining
You could really swear I was wrong
But, you see, the world keeps spinning
So let's have fun, fun playing Mahjong
We tortoises live more than humans
I'm laughing at you cause of this
We are stronger than the Hooligans
And you are weaker than rats that eat cheese
Tortoises are invunerable
Tortoises are indestructible
Tortoises are the motherfuckers
Tortoises are better than you, suckers
If you meet a tortoise in the middle of the street, you should run away yelling "yo, oh shit". Cuz if you make it mad, well, I can assure you that it's going to be bad (bad)

[Hook]
I'm a tortoise (toise)
This is our song (song)
A rap that makes noise (noise)
See ya in Hong Kong (Kong)
Where am I going?
What am I doing?
I'mma go to New York
I'm eating without a fork
I'm a tortoise (toise)
That's what I do (do)
Girlz and boyz (boyz)
See me and say "Woohoo!"

[Verse 3]
Our country is Tortoisea, while yours I don't know
Come to visit us? Well, if you show up I'll say "no"
Our dollars are worth a million of the US ones
So you better get going, before I show you our guns
If you think this song is crap, take a look at your face
Yeah, it may be a rap, but still your stink leaves a trace
As you know, I'm pretty and strong, but you, just shitty and always wrong
We tortoises rule the universe, you, fucking humans, can't even make up a good rap verse

[Hook]
I'm a tortoise (toise)
This is our song (song)
A rap that makes noise (noise)
See ya in Hong Kong (Kong)
Where am I going?
What am I doing?
I'mma go to New York
I'm eating without a fork
I'm a tortoise (toise)
That's what I do (do)
Girlz and boyz (boyz)
See me and say "Woohoo!"

[Outro]
Yeah, tortoise out