MC Lars - Internet Relationships (Are Not Real Relationships) [tekst, tłumaczenie i interpretacja piosenki]

[Narrator]
Internet relationships are not real
Your heart people steal but identities conceal
So here's a tale of warning for girls and boys
Laptop computers can be dangerous toys

[DARYl47] (CarolBabe69)
In the chatroom I inspect
Who's here tonight, ASL check
(I'm a twenty slash F, from the UK)
(Send me an IM and I'll make your day)
I'm twenty-two and my name is Daryl
(Nice to meet you Daryl, my name is Carol)
What do you like, Carol, (I like to go to shows)
(I collect comic books and vintage clothes)
(What do you like?) I like to skate
I play rock guitar but I'm not that great
I like to go on dates and stay up late
I live in San Francisco and hang out on the Haight
(Do you like the Golden Gate?) I did when I was eight
(Maybe I can come and visit) Maybe you should wait
See I'm really forty-seven, I have kids and a wife
I weigh three hundred pounds and I hate my life
(Are you serious?) Yes (Well I've got a secret two)
(I'm not twenty, i'm really thirty-two)
(I only have one leg and I like to sniff glue)
You lied to me Carol! (Well you lied to me too)

It's not normal to have an Internet girlfriend
Online relationships are really just pretend
Unplug your heart, upgrade your system
Get, get off the Internet

[Narrator]
Bob went on MySpace for hours a day
Talking to girls from Moscow to LA
But people can surprise you from behind a screen
Listen to this verse and you'll see what I mean

[SueChick1990] (BOBSTER MAN)
Hi, I'm Susie, I like your profile
I checked out your pics and I like your style
(Sounds good Susie, I'll be your friend)
(We can rate each other again and again)
Comment on my pics and post on my page
Join my groups and guess my age
(You must be eighteen, how could you not)
(You can't be in high school, you're just too hot)
Let me send you pics for your personal collection
I hope they inspire you and give you a smile

[Narrator]
She sent Bob pics that were borderline obscene
The cops showed up at his door, she was only sixteen

It's not normal to have an Internet girlfriend
Online relationships are really just pretend
Unplug your heart, upgrade your system
Get, get off the Internet

[Narrator]
If you don't believe us, here's a final story
About a boy named Marcus and his online girlfriend Lori
Behind the monitor truth is hidden from your eyes
Marcus didn't know but he was in for a surprise

[MARCUSP] (Laurie69)
We've been dating for a while but let's cut to the chase
I don't know what you look like and I wanna see your face
(But what does it matter, you know who I am inside)
What if you're not a woman and this whole time you lied?
(You got me there, I'm not really a female)
(I'm a guy who pretends to be a girl through email)
So this is why it's bad to meet women online
Living life behind the screen is a total waste of time

It's not normal to have an Internet girlfriend
Online relationships are really just pretend
Unplug your heart, upgrade your system
Get, get off the Internet

It's not normal to have an Internet girlfriend
Online relationships are really just pretend
Unplug your heart, upgrade your system
Get, get off the Internet