Is there anybody out there...
[Scarface]
I swear I feel so all alone, back down on my knees again
Hoping you can keep me strong, cause I can't hardly sleep tonight
I took too many sleeping pills, I drunk too many Miller Lites
And I can feel the Reaper near, so please forgive me for my sins
I am just another man, sorry for the pain that I've caused
I know you'll understand, but these demons are driving me insane
I've been going mad, probably oughta blow out my brains
Cause I'm hurting bad but I'm fighting... blast, on the other day
These problems got me using more drugs, along with the other things
I'm slowly fading into my thoughts, (come against me, bring it on!)
And I'm drifting in and out of space, and I don't believe I'm waking up
With the alcohol, demerol, drifting into another world
With the sunshine shinin, and I think I'm finna url
Momma, can ya look at me? This ain't what I used to be
Tomorrow, I'll be somebody else, cause I ain't been me
And I can't seem to shake these things, I'll put that there on every thing
The more I try to figure me out, is like the more I've changed
But my childhood was fucked up - raised rowdy by a single moms
She told me my daddy didn't give a fuck, she ain't let him do his job
Separate the family, and I don't know my next of kin
These days in these fucked up ways, who the fuck are them?
My daddy had three other kids, but I ain't never seen him so
Ain't no sense in coming around now, you ain't been here before
It's sad but I ain't feelin him, my whole life's been a fuckin maze
And when I tried to locate my siblings, they were gone away
Lost inside they other things, fucked me then, fucked me now
Quick to tell me "Show you some love" nigga show you how?
Ain't no love I'm feelin here, I ain't never felt this vile
Momma - did you really love me, or was I just a child?
Sad on the outside, I knew you seen it in my face
I wasn't really happy here, but I was forced to lead the way
Copped me a Chevrolet, drift away to the other side just to think
If I get to see Heaven, I can thank you for the ride
And thank you for my other kids and even though
They mommas won't admit that they can't make it but bad
Low on the child support - always been bad boo, tryna make me out to be
The bad guy that I really ain't, bitches quick to hassle me
Cause I don't see my kids enough, but I make the time to pick 'em up
But you find somethin to stick in my face - it ain't me fuckin up
It's bad enough, face to face, hoes who wanna catch a case
So bad they'll try to give me they baby - and what takes the cake
Is the whole ward is fucking her, daddy know where the weakness at
And you spoke lies to ya old mans eyes, how could you sleep wit that?
Jeopardizing everything, desperate, searching for larger life
Sacrificing the entire family, with no regards to Christ
Funny how people look at life - can take this shit for granted, right?
But then reality strikes, and changes things overnight
I thank the Lord for watching over me, though I'm prone to doin wrong
I repent religiously, hoping that the weak get strong
When the heat gets on {*wind blowing*}
Hoping that the weak get strong, when the heat get's on
[Talking - echo after each pause]
Ya know... it's three different... stages of life...
Either, you're headed into a storm... ya in a storm...
Or ya just got out of a storm... (yeah) think about it...
*music until fade*
News clip: "I got my double-barreled shotgun, the one I call Molly
And I crawled out of the house Army-style, with the rifle cradled in both arms
Alright, I said, just hold it right there, I said 'don't move'
And I walked up on him with the shotgun
And I cocked both barrels of the shotgun on him cause I had double-oughts in it
And (Gunshot)"