Tekst piosenki
1. When you feel your cell phone vibrating in the wrong pocket, someone is thinking of you.
2. After smoking a cigarette or a joint outdoors, never bring the butt or the roach inside with you, it will attract bad spirits.
3. If you find a cigarette butt marked with red lipstick, throw it in the nearest trash can and make a mental note to do something wonderful for your significant other-your relationship needs it.
4. As technology gets more advanced, it has become less receptive to the threat of force. As a child, I could shake a faulty VHS tape into submission—imagine my surprise when this did absolutely nothing for the quality of recording on my video camera.
5. Before you send anyone your nudes, print them out (don’t be so squeamish, you were about to text someone a .jpeg of the same thing) and sleep a night with them under your pillow. On the rare occasion that sending these nudes would be a good idea, you will awaken from a night of lusty dreams about none other than yourself.
6. A single chemtrail in an otherwise cloudless sky: smooth sailing. Two chemtrails that cross paths: trouble ahead.
7. If a child is born that looks more like a cross of the father and the grandmother than a cross of the father and the mother, the child will be a strong swimmer.
8. Only polaroids and film cameras can steal a piece of your soul; no digital camera has a fraction of the storage space that would require. You may feel a pinch on your soul from a digital photograph, but it won’t stick.
Komentarze (0)