Illy Joel Doing It All

Tekst piosenki

Spoken: and that’s what rock n’ roll comes down to, it’s the show. The performance. Everything else secondary to the show

Verse 1:

2016. It’s you boy. First name Illy, last name Joel AKA Marty McFlyist, the time traveling hip hop wizard. I’ve been rapping my whole life and never won a grammy. Yo, let’s do this. Let’s go

I get more head in this class than Dennis Blunden
Chillin’ by a mac classic while Arvid’s giving bumpkins
I’m fuckin’ carol seaver while she’s puking up her lunch
I’m kissing Marcia’s lips while getting cheered on by the bunch

A dirty mother fucker jerking off to TV Guide
A yearly subscription pages sticky cum inside
Keaton is cheatin’ is eaten between Justines thighs
I fucked the whole cast of family ties

Skippy got sickly and left the neighborhood
Tootie, Natalie, and Blair been eaten’ pussy good
Take the good take the bad when you’re eating the beaver
Robot Vicky’s in the closet and so is Ben Seaver

Tony is the boss when it comes to house
He’s fucking Monica putting his hand up Angela’s blouse
Tim Taylor, Al Borland this is my Binford tool
You can call me Mr. Feeny when I’m fucking you at school!

Verse 2:

And that’s how it’s done, but we’re not done yet! I started this whole hip hop shit in 1977. September 29th. Let’s do it!

My Kevin Arnold’s deep inside of Winnie’s popper
I’m getting extra credits after class with Mr. Cooper
Cousin Larry and Balki are fucking Nell Carter
I put my dick inside of Kelly Bundy in front of her father!

T-G-I-F have mercy when you kiss her
Don’t tell me to cut it out when I’m eating Kimmy’s giblet
I’m a not ready for time prime player getting laid at noon
I’m getting blown throughout the house you can call me max headroom

Woody fucking Diane Chambers, Sam is getting mad
In front of Stacy, Mrs. Winslow just fucked both of her dads
Jerry and Elaine just had a three way with Newman’s ass
Kramer fucking George Costanza in a new york cab

I’m a late night host fucking everyone you seen on TV
Each page in my TV Guide is getting extra sticky
Call me Steven Urkel, I will fuck you if you’re fat
Busted a nut too early – did i do that?!

As a matter of fact i did

Spoken: In the past you’ve been sort of cynical about showbiz aspects of the music business, are you still cynical now that you’ve achieved success? No, I’ve met too many stars. Real established big stars, I’ve seen it go to their head. It’s just boring. Well, me, me, me and my deal and my movies and my image. It’s like get away from me! You know?